Michigan at Rutgers
I’ll be able to tell what kind of fan you are based on which Big Ten game you’re watching Saturday night. We’ll probably all watch the first hour of this one, but once Nebraska-Michigan State kicks off, there will be two groups of people watching this one. One group will be people who are fans of Michigan or Rutgers. The other group will be people who should be on multiple government watchlists, assuming they aren’t already.
With every ounce of my being I want to believe that Michigan can take advantage of Rutgers’ well-documented tendency to turn the ball over, but you can’t win a game on nothing but pick-sixes, can you? The Scarlet Knights are not useless defensively. The Wolverines are just short of useless offensively. I don’t think Michigan can score an offensive touchdown on Rutgers, and I can’t believe I just typed that sentence.
Wait, no. I can believe it. What I can’t believe is that it doesn’t seem wrong.
So there’s your Saturday night plan: If you’re a Rutgers fan, watch the whole thing. If you’re a Michigan fan, go get a game of Settlers of Catan going. (Come on, you know every Michigan fan plays Catan.) If you’re anybody else, just peek in on this game every once in a while and switch back immediately if you see Michigan has the ball. Also, don’t use your real name for anything for a couple weeks afterward.
Pick: Rutgers 21, Michigan 13