Mascotology: Picking the Entire NCAA Tournament … by Mascot

From now until the NCAA tournament games begin on Tuesday night, all sorts of experts and prognosticators, along with millions of amateurs competing in office pools, will attempt to predict the outcomes of all 67 of the tournament’s games.

People have all sorts of reasons to pick one team over another. Some break down game footage; others look at advanced statistics; and still others give preference to schools they or their friends attended.

But what if we took a different approach and picked teams based on the strength of their mascots?

Click to join the MSF Bracket Challenge to compete against the Mascotology Bracket as well as other MSF writers, readers, and a dart-throwing ocelot.

Who would win in a matchup between a Spartan and a Crusader or between an orange and a grizzly bear?

Mascotology breaks down the entire NCAA tournament field by looking at who would prevail in a hypothetical meeting of mascots.

For the purposes of this exercise, I am judging the mascot by the person or creature it represents rather than on the quality of the costume itself. But, in cases where it is difficult to pick a winner, I give myself license to award bonus points for the design of the mascot.

First, here is the 2013 NCAA tournament bracket, by mascot:

MIDWEST (INDIANAPOLIS) SOUTH (ARLINGTON, TX)
Lexington – March 21/23 Kansas City – March 22/24
1) Louie the Cardinal, Louisville
1) Big Jay, Kansas
16) Sparky, Liberty/Bulldog, NC A&T
16) Big Red, Western Kentucky
8) CAM the Ram, Colorado State
8) Rameses, North Carolina
9) Truman the Tiger, Missouri
9) Will D. Cat, Villanova
San Jose – March 21/23 Auburn Hills – March 21/23
5) Pistol Pete, Oklahoma State
5) Rodney the Ram, VCU
12) The Oregon Duck, Oregon 12) Zippy the Kangaroo, Akron
4) The Billiken, Saint Louis
4) Wolverines (no mascot), Michigan
13) Pistol Pete, New Mexico State
13) Jack Rabbit, South Dakota State
Auburn Hills – March 21/23 Austin – March 22/24
6) TOM III, Memphis
6) Joe Bruin, UCLA
11) Lightning, MTSU/Gael Force One, St. Mary’s
11) Goldy Gopher, Minnesota
3) Sparty, Michigan State 3) Albert (Gator), Florida
14) The Crusader, Valparaiso
14) Vic the Demon, Northwestern State
Philadelphia – March 22/24 Philadelphia – March 22/24
7) Billy the Bluejay, Creighton
7) Aztec Warrior, San Diego State
10) The Bearcat, Cincinnati
10) Boomer and Sooner, Oklahoma
2) The Blue Devil, Duke
2) Jack the Bulldog, Georgetown
15) Damien the Great Dane, Albany
15) Azul the Eagle, Florida Gulf Coast
WEST (LOS ANGELES) EAST (WASHINGTON, DC)
Salt Lake City – March 21/23 Dayton – March 22/24
1) Spike the Bulldog, Gonzaga
1) Hoosiers (no mascot), Indiana
16) Lacumba, Southern
16) Blackbird, LIU/Duke Dog, James Madison
8) ROC the Panther, Pittsburgh
8) Mr. Wuf, North Carolina State
9) WuShock, Wichita State
9) Hooter the Owl, Temple
Kansas City – March 22/24 San Jose – March 21/23
5) Bucky the Badger, Wisconsin
5) Hey Reb!, UNLV
12) Rebel Black Bear, Mississippi 12) Oski the Bear, California
4) Willie the Wildcat, Kansas State
4) Otto the Orange, Syracuse
13) Buster Bronco, Bosie St./The Explorer, La Salle
13) Monte (Grizzly Bear), Montana
Salt Lake City – March 21/23 Lexington – March 21/23
6) Wilbur Wildcat, Arizona
6) Butler Blue III, Butler
11) Bruiser, Belmont
11) Bucky the Bison, Bucknell
3) Lobo Louie, New Mexico
3) Golden Eagle, Marquette
14) John Harvard, Harvard
14) Mr. Cat, Davidson
Dayton – March 22/24 Austin – March 22/24
7) Leprechaun, Notre Dame
7) Fighting Illini (no mascot), Illinois
10) Cy the Cardinal, Iowa State
10) Chip (Buffalo), Colorado
2) Brutus, Ohio State
2) Sebastian the Ibis, Miami
15) Killian, Iona
15) Powercat, Pacific

—————————————————————————————————————

 

Midwest Region

First Round

Sparky (Liberty) v. Bulldog (North Carolina A&T)
Tuesday, the first night of tournament play, will see this showdown between Sparky, an eagle representing the Liberty Flames, and North Carolina A&T’s bulldog. A bird of prey beats a domesticated house pet every time. Sparky advances.

Lightning (Middle Tennessee) v. Gael Force One (St. Mary’s)
Tuesday also pits Middle Tennessee against St. Mary’s. As of Sunday afternoon, these teams were on the bubble. Had they been judged by their mascots alone, they would have been locks.

Lightning is a blue, winged horse with big teeth. Gael Force One is some sort of giant (inflatable?) knight (and possibly Cylon). I love both mascots, but Gael Force One, who stands 10 feet tall, would frighten any horse, winged or otherwise.

St. Mary's calls this 10-foot knight/robot/bubble "Gael Force One." (Photo from the Saint Mary's athletics website)

St. Mary’s calls this 10-foot knight/robot/bubble “Gael Force One.” (Photo from the Saint Mary’s athletics website)

Second Round

Louie the Cardinal (Louisville) v. Sparky (Liberty)
A cardinal against and eagle. This one’s easy. Liberty’s mascot advances to the round of 32, and we have our first ever 16-beats-1 upset.

CAM the Ram (Colorado State) v. Truman the Tiger (Missouri)
Rams sound like they should be intimidating, but it’s really nothing more than a male sheep. Truman the Tiger has no trouble with CAM the Ram.

Pistol Pete (Oklahoma State) v. The Oregon Duck (Oregon)
Anyone who had an original Nintendo Entertainment System with a light gun knows how this match-up will turn out. Pistol Pete wins.

The Billiken (Saint Louis) v. Pistol Pete (New Mexico State)
There is no team in this year’s field that I’m pulling for more than the Saint Louis Billikens. But a billiken is a charm doll with a big belly and even bigger cheekbones, and is quite possibly the least intimidating mascot in the entire field.

Thursday in San Jose will see two victories for mascots named “Pistol Pete.”

The late, great St. Louis coach Rick Majerus standing next to a statue of a billiken. (Photo by Jeff Roberson, Associated Press)

The late, great St. Louis coach Rick Majerus standing next to a statue of a billiken. (Photo by Jeff Roberson, Associated Press)

TOM III (Memphis) v. Gael Force One (St. Mary’s)
This is a tough one. Generally I would favor a tiger (TOM III) over a human. But Gael Force One appears to be wearing armor from head to toe and may shoot lasers out of his eyes. GF1 advances.

Sparty (Michigan State) v. The Crusader (Valparaiso)
I’m sure that there were plenty of advances in military technology between the Peloponnesian War and the Crusades. Nonetheless, I give the edge here to the Spartans.

The residents of ancient Sparta, perhaps more than the people of any other city in the world at any other time in history, are known for their skill in battle. Sparty defeats the Crusader and moves on.

Billy the Bluejay (Creighton) v. The Bearcat (Cincinnati)
A bearcat isn’t an actual thing. But were there such a thing as a bear-wildcat hybrid, it would defeat a bluejay every time.

The Blue Devil (Duke) v. Damien the Great Dane (Albany)
Jesus, while speaking to a crowd about spiritual beings and forces, said, “Every kingdom involved in civil war becomes a wasteland. Every city or house torn apart by divisions will collapse” (Matthew 12:25, CEB).

Duke is a Christian school (United Methodist) with one of the nation’s most esteemed divinity schools that is home to America’s foremost theologian, Stanley Hauerwas. Yet its mascot is a devil. Duke’s nickname actually comes from les Diables Bleus, a French military unit in World War I. But the mascot is not an early 20th century French soldier. It is the devil.

So the Blue Devil loses to a great dane named, ironically enough, “Damien.”

Third Round

Sparky (Liberty) v. Truman the Tiger (Missouri)
I can’t imagine that an eagle would ever mess with a tiger. But a tiger wouldn’t even be able to mess with an eagle. Were we dealing with a lesser bird, I’d give the edge to the Tiger. But an eagle is big enough, strong enough, and deadly enough to carry Liberty into the Sweet 16.

Pistol Pete (Oklahoma State) v. Pistol Pete (New Mexico State)
Here we have a battle of Pistol Petes. Oklahoma State’s Pete gets the victory, if only because New Mexico State’s Pete once suffered the indignity of having Utah State mascot Big Blue rip off his fake mustache during a timeout.

New Mexico State mascot Pistol Pete attacks Utah State's Big Blue, after Big Blue had removed Pete's fake mustache during a 2009 WAC Tournament game. (AP Photo/The Herald Journal, Eli Lucero, File)

New Mexico State mascot Pistol Pete attacks Utah State’s Big Blue, after Big Blue had removed Pete’s fake mustache during a 2009 WAC Tournament game. (AP Photo/The Herald Journal, Eli Lucero, File)

Gael Force One (St. Mary’s) v. Sparty (Michigan State)
Gael Force One finally meets its match. The Spartans didn’t stand down in the Battle of Thermopylae. And Sparty isn’t going to stand down against a Gaelic robo-knight. “No retreat, no surrender. That is Spartan law.”

The Bearcat (Cincinnati) v. Damien the Great Dane (Albany)
I hate allowing a fake animal to advance all the way to the Sweet 16. But a large, wild carnivore beats a domesticated pet, even if that domesticated pet is a large dog.

Sweet 16

Sparky (Liberty) v. Pistol Pete (Oklahoma State)
Since there are no longer any eagles on the U.S. government’s endangered species list, I can’t imagine that a cowboy like Pistol Pete would have any qualms about firing his pistol at a bird of prey. Oklahoma State moves on.

Sparty (Michigan State) v. The Bearcat (Cincinnati)
I’m convinced that an armed Spartan warrior would hold his own against a bearcat. Sparty takes down Cincinnati’s fake predator once and for all.

Sparty advances to the Elite Eight (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)

Sparty advances to the Elite Eight (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)

Elite Eight

Pistol Pete (Oklahoma State) v. Sparty (Michigan State)
Sparty certainly looks more intimidating, but Pistol Pete has a big advantage when it comes to weaponry. Sparty also has bare arms and legs, leaving him vulnerable to attack. Pistol Pete wins this round and represents the Midwest Region in the Final Four.

Pistol_Pete_-_Oklahoma_State_Wallpaper_zgarl

 

West Region

First Round

Buster Bronco (Boise State) v. The Explorer (La Salle)
Few things are as valuable to an explorer as a tame horse. A bronco — a wild horse or one with a tendency to buck — on the other hand, could cause an explorer all sorts of problems. Buster Bronco gets the first-round win.

Second Round

Spike the Bulldog (Gonzaga) v. Lacumba (Southern)
Lacumba is a jaguar, the sight of which would leave a bulldog cowering in fear. Unfortunately, Southern has traditionally had live mascots, the most recent of whom (the jaguar Lacumba II) died in 2004. The university planned to create a special habitat for a new jaguar mascot but scrapped those plans in 2010.

Since Southern’s mascot situation remains unresolved, Spike moves on.

ROC the Panther (Pittsburgh) v. WuShock (Wichita State)
WuShock is a wheat shocker, one who gathers wheat into sheaves or shocks. It’s a great mascot, but WuShock is no match for a panther.

WuShock: He's a great mascot, but he'll be spending the rest of March in Wichita. (Photo from Wichita.edu)

WuShock: He’s a great mascot, but he’ll be spending the rest of March in Wichita. (Photo from Wichita.edu)

Bucky the Badger (Wisconsin) v. Rebel Black Bear (Mississippi)
I’m picking an upset here. Badgers, honey or otherwise, are nasty little creatures. I think Mississippi’s new Rebel Black Bear (the recent replacement for Colonel Reb) gets badgered into frustration and walks away. Bucky wins.

Willie the Wildcat (Kansas State) v. Buster Bronco (Boise State)
Hoofed mammals don’t generally fare well against carnivores. But a wildcat isn’t going to take down a bronco. Buster moves on.

Wilbur Wildcat (Arizona) v. Bruiser (Belmont)
Bruiser is a bruin, which is a brown bear. The average wildcat is faster and more agile than the average bear. But a brown bear’s considerable size advantage would be too much for a wildcat to overcome. Bruiser wins this one.

Lobo Louie (New Mexico) v. John Harvard (Harvard)
John Harvard, for whom Harvard University is named, was a 17th-century clergyman who settled in Massachusetts in the 1630s. Lobo Louie is a wolf. I’m sure that an earlier American settler would be resourceful when it comes to dealing with wild animals. Still, I think Louie Lobo wins this round.

Leprechaun (Notre Dame) v. Cy the Cardinal (Iowa State)
This is possibly the least interesting mascot matchup in the entire bracket. A leprechaun and a cardinal. I don’t have a lot of faith in small, colored birds. And a leprechaun is a magical creature. Notre Dame gets the victory.

Brutus (Ohio State) v. Killian (Iona)
A buckeye is a nut from the Aesculus glabra tree. Killian is a Gael, a person who speaks a Goidelic, such as Irish or Scottish Gaelic. It would be an insult to the people of the British Isles to say that Killian couldn’t outlast a nut. Iona moves on.

Third Round

Spike the Bulldog (Gonzaga) v. ROC the Panther (Pittsburgh)
Spike advanced into the third round on a technicality, and he’s not going any further. Pittsburgh’s panther is too much for Gonzaga’s bulldog, and ROC gets the win.

Bucky the Badger (Wisconsin) v. Buster Bronco (Boise State)
Badgers and broncos aren’t animals that are known to interact with each other. But I’m guessing that a wild horse would be too big and too fast for a badger to deal with. Buster moves on to the Sweet 16.

Bucky the Badger's Cinderella run ends in the round of 32. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images North America)

Bucky the Badger’s Cinderella run ends in the round of 32. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images North America)

Bruiser (Belmont) v. Louie Lobo (New Mexico)
The biggest wolves weigh just under 100 pounds. It’s not unusual for a brown bear to weigh more than 1,000 pounds. Louie Lobo is a wolf. Bruiser is a brown bear. Bruiser wins.

Leprechaun (Notre Dame) v. Killian (Iona)
Killian, a Gael, knows all about leprechauns and their magical powers. Iona’s Killian catches Notre Dame’s leprechaun and gets three wishes, one of which is to advance to the Sweet 16.

Sweet 16

ROC the Panther (Pittsburgh) v. Buster the Bronco (Boise State)
Buster outlasted a wildcat and a badger, but he won’t fare well against a panther. ROC moves on to the Elite Eight.

Bruiser (Belmont) v. Killian (Iona)
Killian the Gael would never have seen a carnivore as large or as intimidating as a brown bear. Bruiser the bruin sends Killian running (and it’s never a good idea to run from a bear) and takes a trip to the regional final.

Elite Eight

ROC the Panther (Pittsburgh) v. Bruiser (Belmont)
Bruiser, a brown bear, has used his considerable size advantage to tear through the bracket. And while a bruin is considerably larger than a jaguar, that difference isn’t nearly as stark as, say, the difference in size between a bear and wolf.

I think ROC, a panther, with his speed, dexterity, and long, sharp teeth takes this round and gives Pitt its first Final Four in school history.

ROC, Pitt's Panther, represents the West Region in the Final Four. (Photo: Charles LeClaire/Getty Images)

ROC, Pitt’s Panther, represents the West Region in the Final Four. (Photo: Charles LeClaire/Getty Images)

South Region

Second Round

Big Jay (Kansas) v. Big Red (Western Kentucky)
“Jayhawks,” Kansas’s nickname, is short for “Jayhawkers,” groups of militants who fought with pro-slavery forces from Missouri before the Civil War. Big Jay, the school’s mascot, is a bird.

Big Red, mascot of the Western Kentucky Hilltoppers, is a red blob/monster, who wouldn’t have been out of place in the opening sequence of “The Muppet Show.” I’m of the opinion that blob beats bird and give this round to Big Red. Yet another 16-beats-1 upset.

Rameses (North Carolina) v. Will D. Cat (Villanova)
Rameses, mascot of the North Carolina Tar Heels, is a ram. And, as I mentioned above, a ram is really just a sheep. But in the case of Rameses, we’re talking about a sheep whose size and big horns make him too much for a wildcat, such as Villanova’s Will D. Cat, to handle.

Rodney the Ram (VCU) v. Zippy the Kangaroo (Akron)
The big horns would give a ram, like VCU’s Rodney, a fighting chance against a kangaroo, like Akron’s Zippy. But kangaroos have been known to dabble in boxing, so Zippy takes this round.

Wolverines (Michigan) v. Jack Rabbit (South Dakota State)
Michigan doesn’t actually have a mascot. So even though a wolverine would have its way with a jackrabbit, Jack Rabbit and SDSU get a pass into the second round.

Joe Bruin (UCLA) v. Goldy Gopher (Minnesota)
Belmont’s Bruiser showed us that bruins are a tough out in Mascotology. A gopher certainly isn’t going to do anything to a half-ton brown bear. Joe Bruin and UCLA win easily.

Albert the Gator (Florida) v. Vic the Demon (Northwestern State)
Demons — whether the dark spiritual beings we encounter in the New Testament, the djinn in the Qur’an, or the Asuras in Hindu spirituality — can wreak havoc on the weak in mind and spirit, including non-human animals such as alligators. Vic gets into Albert’s head and moves on to the Third Round.

Watch out for Vic the Demon and Northwestern State.

Watch out for Vic the Demon and Northwestern State.

Aztec Warrior (San Diego State) v. Boomer and Sooner (Oklahoma)
Oklahoma’s official mascot is the Sooner Schooner, a Conestoga wagon pulled by two live horses. Since driving a horse-drawn wagon inside a basketball arena would be asking for disaster, Oklahoma uses Boomer and Sooner, costumed versions of the horses, for indoor sports.

You may recall from history class that the Aztecs’ first encounter with horses didn’t go very well. The Aztec Warrior will remember what happened in Tenochtitlan 500 years ago and will get his revenge on the genus Equus by taking down Boomer and Sooner.

Jack the Bulldog (Georgetown) v. Azul the Eagle (Florida Gulf Coast)
It should be clear from my previous picks that I believe “bird of prey > house pet.” Azul wins in a rout.

Third Round

Big Red (Western Kentucky) v. Rameses (North Carolina)
I’m not sure why, but I like Big Red here. The blob/Muppet goes to the Sweet 16.

Big Red, college basketball's favorite blob/monster/Muppet. (Photo from Wikipedia)

Big Red, college basketball’s favorite blob/monster/Muppet. (Photo from Wikipedia)

Zippy the Kangaroo (Akron) v. Jack Rabbit (South Dakota State)
Here we have two mascots with impressive hops. But there’s no question that a kangaroo is more intimidating than a rabbit, jack or otherwise. Zippy keeps playing.

Joe the Bruin (UCLA) v. Vic the Demon (Northwestern State)
I’ve never really been into demonology, but I think that the spiritual forces of wickedness prevail in this matchup. Vic drives Joe to insanity and advances.

Aztec Warrior (San Diego State) v. Azul the Eagle (Florida Gulf Coast)
I would imagine that San Diego State’s Aztec Warrior would treat an eagle such as Azul with reverence. But if that eagle were to attack, the Aztec Warrior would prevail. San Diego State moves on to the Sweet 16.

Sweet 16

Big Red (Western Kentucky) v. Zippy the Kangaroo (Akron)
Big Red, a blob, would be impervious to any amount of boxing or kicking on Zippy’s part. Big Red and Western head to the Elite Eight.

Vic the Demon (Northwestern State) v. Aztec Warrior (San Diego State)
An Aztec Warrior may be too strong-willed for a demon. I’m picking the Aztec to defeat Vic the Demon and advance to play Big Red.

Elite Eight

Big Red (Western Kentucky) v. Aztec Warior (San Diego State)
My heart says Big Red, but no Aztec Warrior is going to be foiled by a poor man’s Sesame Street character. The Aztec and San Diego State go to the Final Four.

San Diego State's Aztec Warrior heads to the Final Four. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images North America)

San Diego State’s Aztec Warrior heads to the Final Four. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images North America)

East Region

First Round

Blackbird (Long Island University) v. Duke Dog (James Madison)
Duke Dog, the mascot for the James Madison Dukes, is a bulldog who also happens to be nobility. A greater bird would defeat a bulldog, regardless of whether that dog was an aristocrat. But Duke Dog outlasts Long Island’s Blackbird.

Second Round

Hoosiers (Indiana) v. Duke Dog (James Madison)
Indiana, like Michigan, doesn’t have an actual mascot. Duke Dog, the dog who wears a crown, advances on a technicality, meaning Gonzaga is the only No. 1 seed to advance past its first matchup.

Mr. Wuf (North Carolina State) v. Hooter the Owl (Temple)
If you’re a rodent, few things are as frightening as an owl. If you’re a wolf, an owl probably doesn’t bother you. Mr. Wuf, a wolf, takes this one.

Hey Reb! (UNLV) v. Oski the Bear (California)
People like Hey Reb!, the UNLV athletic department’s version of Yosemite Sam, are the reason why Golden Bears such as Oski are extinct now. UNLV moves on.

Otto the Orange (Syracuse) v. Monte (Montana)
Monte, Montana’s mascot, is a grizzly bear. Otto is a piece of fruit. This one’s easy. Monte wins.

Butler Blue III (Butler) v. Bucky the Bison (Bucknell)
Butler’s Blue III is one of the most lovable mascots in all of college sports, but a large, wild animal is more intimidating than a small domesticated one.

If we were looking for the cutest mascot, Butler Blue III (left) would win this thing going away.

If we were looking for the cutest mascot, Butler Blue III (left) would win this thing going away.

Golden Eagle (Marquette) v. Mr. Cat (Davidson)
By now, you know how I feel about both birds of prey and wildcats. An eagle would have no problem with a wildcat. So Marquette’s Golden Eagle has no trouble with Davidson’s Mr. Cat.

Fighting Illini (Illinois) v. Chip (Colorado)
Illinois hasn’t had a mascot since the school retired Chief Illiniwek in 2007 after the NCAA deemed the chief “hostile or abusive” to Native Americans.  Chip, Colorado’s costumed buffalo mascot (not to be confused with Ralphie, the live bison mascot at Colorado football games), gets the win.

Sebastian the Ibis (Miami) v. Powercat (Pacific)
If the Miami Hurricanes had come up with a hurricane mascot, they would have won this tournament easily. But they went with Sebastian the Ibis, who is a nice mascot but no match for Powercat, Pacific’s tiger.

Third Round

Duke Dog (James Madison) v. Mr. Wuf (North Carolina State)
Once again we have a matchup between a wild animal (Mr. Wuf) and a domesticated one (Duke Dog). You know what happens. Mr. Wuf goes to the Sweet 16.

Hey Reb! (UNLV) v. Monte (Montana)
UNLV’s mountain man mascot, Hey Reb!, has already taken out one bear. Here, he takes out another.

Bucky the Bison (Bucknell) v. Golden Eagle (Marquette)
Eagles have done well thus far in this bracket. But a bison like Bucky is much too large for Marquette’s Golden Eagle. Bucky and Bucknell head to the Sweet 16.

Chip (Colorado) v. Powercat (Pacific)
A bison may be too big for an eagle, but it’s not too big for a tiger. Powercat and the Pacific Tigers move on.

Sweet 16

Mr. Wuf (North Carolina State) v. Hey Reb! (UNLV)
You won’t find many wolves in the western United States these days, thanks in part to frontiersmen like Hey Reb! Hey Reb! does to Mr. Wuf what he did to the two bears.

Bucky the Bison (Bucknell) v. Powercat (Pacific)
Powercat took down one ungulate in the third round. He takes down another in the Sweet 16.

Elite Eight

Hey Reb! (UNLV) v. Powercat (Pacific)
I’m guessing that a tiger would give Hey Reb! more problems than a bear or wolf. But I’m picking Hey Reb! to continue his reign of terror and advance to the Final Four.

Wild animals weren't able to stop Hey Reb! from winning the East Region and going to the Final Four. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images North America)

Wild animals weren’t able to stop Hey Reb! from winning the East Region and going to the Final Four. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images North America)

Final Four

Semifinal

Pistol Pete (Oklahoma State) v. ROC the Panther (Pittsburgh)
Pistol Pete has one obvious advantage over ROC the Panther, namely the pistol. But I’m going to pick an upset. I’m going to say that ROC will be too fierce and too intimidating for Pistol Pete, who will have never seen a panther before.

Aztec Warrior (San Diego State) v. Hey Reb! (UNLV)
An Aztec warrior should be more intimidating than a mountain man, but look at the pictures above and tell me which is more frightening. Hey Reb! has crazy in his eyes; he also has a technological advantage over his conference rival. Hey Reb! and UNLV advance.

Final

Hey Reb! (UNLV) v. ROC the Panther (Pittsburgh)
Man versus beast. I could see this going either way.

But after besting two bears, a wolf, a tiger, and an Aztec warrior, Hey Reb! survives another round and defeats ROC the Panther to win Mascotology.

And there was much rejoicing in Las Vegas. (Photo by Sam Morris / Las Vegas Sun)

And there was much rejoicing in Las Vegas. (Photo by Sam Morris / Las Vegas Sun)

*****

What picks did you agree with or disagree with? Which mascot wins your Masctology bracket? Chime in below.



About Josh Tinley

Josh Tinley writes the Away From The Action column at Midwest Sports Fans, covering all aspects of sport aside from what actually happens on the field, court, or track. Josh grew up in Indianapolis and graduated from the University of Evansville and Vanderbilt Divinity School. He is the author of Kneeling in the End Zone: Spiritual Lessons From the World of Sports and the managing editor of LinC, a weekly curriculum for teens that explores the intersection of faith and culture. Josh lives outside Nashville with his wife, Ashlee, and children, Meyer (7), Resha Kate (5), and Malachi (3). He will not allow himself to die before the Evansville Purple Aces make another trip to the NCAA Tournament. Follow him on Twitter @joshtinley or send him an e-mail.

Comments

  1. Terrific analysis! Two prominent mustaches in the final four sounds about right.

    Some historical background to the mustaches is available here:
    http://upperlipfur.com/mustached-mascots-of-the-2013-ncaa-mens-basketball-tournament/

  2. Big Red!!

  3. According to my girlfriend who has successfully won office pool tournaments you are doing this wrong. You arent supposed to look at the actual mascot but rather the animal or thing that represents the school and then determine who would win in a fight to the death.

  4. Pistol Pete afraid of a cat after he’s defeated everything else? Don’t think so. I think it would be an epic battle between Pete and Hey Reb, with the decision to go to the fastest draw and the best mustache — of course, Pete.

  5. Jayhawkers fought against pro-slavery forces in the Civil War. Particularly in the state of Misery.

  6. Minimum level of research fail. A bearcat is very much a real thing

    http://cincyzoo.wikispaces.com/file/view/3010_bearcat_a.jpg/196969604/418×276/3010_bearcat_a.jpg

  7. Isn’t that the best way to pick your bracket? We are sure that most people that play the brackets don’t know anything about college hoops and either pick based on name of the team or their mascot.

  8. Nothing in this group of 65 can take down a Grizzly. Running Rebels run for a reason, in this case to run away. Go Griz!

  9. John Ellison says:

    It can’t be said enough. The Jayhawkers fought AGAINST slavery, not with pro-slavery Missourians. History much?

  10. Steve JOnes says:

    Jayhawks were ANTI-SLAVERY and bleeding Kanas sparked the civil war which led the to slaves being freed? How stupid is the author of this article? Unbelievable.

  11. What happens if Ole Miss goes up against UNLV?

  12. mikecincy1 says:

    a bearcat is a real animal dummy. Also known as the Binturong, a viverrine mammal from Southeast Asia. i know this article is meant to be entertaining, and it is, but saying its fake, makes you seem stupid.

  13. classic grammar problem… if i say, “I fought with my brother” – does that mean against him or alongside of him?

  14. +1 Delta. NOONE can survive the wrath of a RAGING Griz–especailly one named Monte!!!
    GO GRIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!

  15. Justincredible says:

    No WAY some crazed ex-Civil-War miner/mountain man takes down Powercat, a Bengal TIGER. Powercat for the WIN, BABY! GO TIGERS!

  16. Pistol Pete vs Pistol Pete (Oklahoma St vs New Mexico State) in round 2.

    -both mascots were inspired by Frank Eaton. Eaton, a US Marshal, author, cowboy, and Wild West Icon, is reputed to have a faster draw than Buffalo Bill. In 1868, his father was shot by a band of vigilantes, former Confederate supporters. Eaton became a US Marshal to avenge his father’s killers, claiming in 1887 that he had killed five of the six. The one remaining escaped by being shot by someone else.

    more details here: http://bit.ly/XZ6wqS

  17. It comes down to making sure our family gets their fair share. The rich are trying to hide this from you and we are going to expose it!!! Google “SMART CRAZY STOCKS”” then go to the top site. Then click on their PENNY STOCK section so you can see the truth!

  18. You’re an idiot. A bearcat is a real animal. At least do your research before you speak, even if it’s something as rediculous as this.

  19. jowepifnpwoifjwq says:

    There’s no way a Spartan could have beaten a Crusader! Too much tech advancement over a thousand + years.

Trackbacks

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