Due to Thanksgiving, it’s effect on my job, and my band playing some shows last week, I didn’t have time to get a drinking game posted.
I owe you one, America.
Thanks for dropping by for this week’s action. To atone, here’s a video of a little kid (internet rumors say that he is Atlanta center Al Horford’s younger brother, but I haven’t confirmed that) grabbing some candy and shamelessly eyeballing a cheerleader.
Luckily for us, this week’s MNF game features a putrid matchup between the 2-8 Panthers and the 3-7 Eagles. It will take copious amounts of alcohol just to make it through the game, so we have that advantage going in.
On a side note, how pissed is ESPN at the quality of Monday Night games they’ve gotten?
They pay approximately $1.5 billion a year for the rights to broadcast MNF, and in return they get a steady stream of turd sandwiches to show the fans. Don’t get me wrong; I’m happy any time ESPN does something stupid – and paying $1.5 billion a year for these awful games is definitely stupid – but it just seems like fans deserve better than sloppy thirds after the Thursday and Sunday night games.
Anyway, let’s get on to the drinking game rules.
Monday Night Football Drinking Game: Eagles v Panthers
Take one drink each time one of the following things happen:
- Andy Reid or Ron Rivera’s job securities are discussed
- Either team commits a turnover (come on Foles, we know you have 4 or 5 in the tank)
- Bryce Brown records a carry of 5 or more yards
- “Arizona” is said by Tirico or Gruden
- Either team records a sack
- An offensive play results in a gain of 20 or more yards
- Cam Newton records a rushing attempt (sacks don’t count)
- Philadelphia’s fans boo their own team
- Steve Smith catches a pass
- A personal foul penalty is committed
- A kickoff or punt results in anything but a return (fair catch, touchback, penalty)
- Jonathan Stewart or DeAngelo Will- ah, screw it, you can’t count on either of those guys to do anything
- The word “concussion” or the phrase “player safety” is said by Tirico or Gruden
- Brent Celek catches a pass
- Gerry Austin’s voice is heard but he is not shown on screen
- Any mention of Michael Vick’s dog fighting conviction, NFL suspension, or jail time
- Nick Foles misses a receiver by more than 5 yards (up to your discretion)
- Gruden disagrees with a call or no-call
- Cam Newton does his Superman celebration
- A player points his arm after a first down
Be sure to check out next week’s drinking game for a recap of this one!