Jay Cutler Dominates: Despite Absence, Jay Cutler’s Dominance Lives On In Generosity, Eloquence, and Shredded Muscles

I have been documenting and showcasing Jay Cutler’s dominance for four months now, but the dominance has long preceded just the last four months.

Cutler’s whole NFL career is pure dominance, whether it be the baby-face looks on the sideline, the shining moments when Cutler throws it to the other team, or the carefully placed hand-offs to the running back…Cutler has and does it all.

A lot of you are probably thinking “Boy, I wonder if Cutler is still relevant as a QB in the NFL when players like T.J. Yates, Tim Tebow, Cam Newton, and Andy Dalton are demonstrating to us their potential to be star QBs?” Well, that’s a pretty stupid question to ask, and it obviously shows your ignorance and lack of intelligence because there is no better QB than Jay Cutler.

Let me show you why.

Cutler’s Natural Ability to Throw to Both Teams

I don’t what to hear how good Aaron Rodgers is or how skillful and talented Drew Brees is. (I heard he broke some stupid record. I’ll believe it when I see it.) Rodgers and Brees are very selfish with the ball; and I don’t about you, but my mom didn’t raise me to be a selfish person, and it seems like Cutler’s mom didn’t either.

This is what’s called sharing, and it’s the right thing to do.

 

I could watch that all day.

Cutler’s Dominance of the English Language

A writer (yes, Jay Cutler is a writer) uses repetition to hammer home a meaning or feeling the writer wants the reader or listener to understand. It’s true that Cutler uses the phrase “you know” 57 times in the video below, but in that crazy amount of usage, there has to be a meaning. I just haven’t figured it out yet.

Jay’s ways are above my intelligence and most definitely above any Packers fans’.

Jay Cutler=Hall of Fame QB and literary genius.

Cutler’s Dominance of the Offseason Workouts

I also hear a lot about how Cutler doesn’t put forth much, if any, effort into his game. That’s a complete lie. According to Wikipedia, Jay Cutler is also a bodybuilder and has won Mr. Olympia four times. I have no idea what the hell that means, but it sounds pretty awesome, and hard to accomplish when you have to juggle football on top of lifting weights in competitions.

All Rodgers does outside of football is star in stupid, unfunny, and intelligence-insulting commercials.

Getting huge > Being unfunny



About Tyler Juranovich

Tyler Juranovich is an Indiana native, a Ball State student, and a senior writer for MSF, where he's been writing about Chicago sports since 2009. His favorite teams are the Chicago Blackhawks and Bears. He's also a lover of reading, music, and movies. Follow him on Twitter (@tylerjuranovich) or email him at tyler.juranovich@gmail.com

Comments

  1. USMCvet0231 says:

    I don't see how you missed this. "Bodybuilder" Jay Cutler is a different person from "Quarterback" Jay Cutler. There is simply no way anyone could do both. You even have a video of BB Jay Cutler, and you can't see it isnt the same guy? I know they both overlap on search results but it should seem pretty obvious that QB Jay Cutler is NOT Mr Olympia…

  2. Ya know, this is literally the most ignorant thing I’ve read in a long time. A couple minutes of my life I will never get back. A couple minutes I would trade for eating a pile of dog sh&@ if given the opportunity. I hope this clown doesn’t get paid for this. Wow.

  3. Very informative your article. Great blog.

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  5. What’s up, just wanted to tell you, I enjoyed this article.

    It was funny. Keep on posting!

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