Looking for a new sports fetish? Consider “freestyle canoeing”

I got an email today with the subject line “Midwest Sports fans rejoice.” Naturally I opened it, as it sounded like something that would be right in our wheelhouse here at Midwest Sports Fans.

I was not in any way, shape, or form, prepared for what I was about to see.

Inside the email was this simple message:

The moment you’ve all been waiting for..

Mid-West Freestyle Canoe

I had never, before that moment, even seen the words “freestyle” and “canoe” in such close proximity, as if they were suggesting some kind of actual activity that people participate in. Freestyle canoe? It made no sense, unless maybe as a description for a time when Li’l Wayne, Snoop Dogg, and Eminem were at a lake party and decided to take a canoe out for a while and do some rapping.

But when I clicked on the YouTube link provided in the email, I quickly learned that “freestyle canoe” is, in fact, an actual activity that people participate in. And while watching that first video, there was one word that kept popping into my head over and over and over: bizarre.

Just watch. The action really starts about 1:20.

Yes, you did in fact just watch a man dressed in a three-piece suit (sans jacket) paddle himself around in circles in a canoe to the tune of “Lady in Red” while actual spectators looked on and applauded.

And you know what’s crazy? This isn’t even one of the more bizarre freestyle canoe routines available on YouTube. Not even close. The next two I clicked on were both far more bizarre and involved yet another bizarre element: intricate costuming.

In this video, a man is dressed up as Phantom and maneuvers his canoe to the tune of, you guessed it, Phantom of the Opera.

And in this next video, some guy who thinks he’s Jack Sparrow dresses like Jack Sparrow and performs triumphantly to the Pirates of the Caribbean theme song.

I have to be honest. I’m still a little bit in shock. I don’t follow all sports, but I do feel like I have a pretty good grasp on what sports are out there, or at least what sports would be reasonably possible. The concept of freestyle canoe has never entered my sphere of influence, and I’m still not sure I believe it even after watching these videos. It’s like a cross between canoeing, synchronized swimming, and Halloween, with the spirit of LARPing thrown in for good measure.

With all that said, whether it’s bizarre to me or not, clearly these folks get a giant kick of it, so I say good for them. Just because some jackwagon blogger doesn’t understand anything about the sport and decides to be snarky about it doesn’t lessen its excitement or sheer awesomeness for the people who participate in it.

In fact, the more I write about this, the more I am finding my mind focus less on mocking the shocking images I just watched and more on trying to decide what song and costume I would choose for my freestyle canoe routine. First instinct: Can’t Help Falling In Love by UB40. It’s got “freestyle canoe” written all over it.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go find a costume. The NFL is still embroiled in a lockout and college football is proven more dirty and slimy by the day. It’s time to start considering alternatives. The Midwest Freestyle Symposium is on September 16th. I’ve gotta be ready.



About Jerod Morris

I love words. I write for Copyblogger and founded MSF, The Assembly Call, & Primility. I practice yoga, eat well, & strive for balance. I love life. Namaste. Say hi on Twitter, Facebook, & G+.

Comments

  1. Hilariously written article, Jerod! Very well done. And thanks for helping to bring more attention to the sport of paddling (as a whole)!! ツ We can’t wait to see your video to UB40!!! *wink*

  2. It’ll also save a lot of cash and time for those on

  3. Great website! It looks extremely professional! Keep up the great job!

  4. You have remarkable information right. ’

  5. It’s clear you’re passionate about the issues.

  6. Thanks for all of your effort on this site. My daughter really loves conducting research and it is easy to understand why. I know all concerning the powerful way you provide good techniques via your blog and even foster contribution from website visitors on the idea plus my child is now starting to learn a lot. Have fun with the remaining portion of the year. You have been performing a pretty cool job.

  7. whoah this blog is excellent i love studying your posts. Keep up the good paintings! You already know, many persons are looking round for this information, you could help them greatly.

  8. I would love Engravable 4 Birthstone Circle Pendant to signify my loved ones. I would never sneeze at any of these magnificent diamond studs either.

  9. approved cash advance ’ https://www.volspaydayloansonlinecash.com/ payday loans online same day

  10. cash advance loans ’ https://www.swqspaydayonlineloans.com/ online payday loans direct lenders

  11. cash advance loans ’ https://www.lahecashadvanceloans.com/ payday loans online

  12. online payday advance ’
    https://swqspaydayonlineloans.com/

  13. So, in this way they help you fetch maximum target audience with the help of which you get more conversions and more ROI. However, the security features of Internet Explorer are smart enough to detect the fake URLs. He is the former VP of Design – Europ A where he worked with several hundred businesses over the course of 6 years, helping them grow their business both on and off line.

  14. Sweet blog! I found it while surfing around on Yahoo News. Do you have any tips on how to get listed in Yahoo News? I’ve been trying for a while but I never seem to get there!

  15. I’ve been browsing online more than 3 hours as of late, yet I by no means discovered any attention-grabbing article like yours. It is lovely worth sufficient for me. In my opinion, if all site owners and bloggers made just right content material as you probably did, the internet will probably be much more useful than ever before.

  16. Hi to every one, because I am in fact eager of reading this blog’s post to be updated daily.

  17. affordable car insurance – car insurance rates (general auto insurance)

  18. quick cash – online loan (quick cash)

  19. best loan companies – personal loans (online payday loan)

  20. cash advance american express – cash advance online (fast cash loans)

  21. You really make it seem really easy with your presentation however I in finding this topic to be actually one thing which I feel I’d never understand. It kind of feels too complex and very wide for me. I am looking forward on your subsequent post, I will attempt to get the hang of it!

  22. cash advance usa cash advance near me fast cash loans [url=https://paydayloansonlinergc.org/]quick cash loans[/url] ’

  23. loans bad credit payday loans bad credit cash advance online [url=https://cashadvanceonlinenhd.org/]quick cash loans[/url] ’

  24. easy personal loan – instant payday loans (bad credit installment loans)

  25. car insurance quotes direct auto insurance full coverage auto insurance [url=https://cheapestcarinsurancehax.org/]online auto insurance[/url] ’

  26. bad credit loan loan bad credit loans people bad credit [url=https://loansbadcreditrej.org/]loans people bad credit[/url] ’

  27. best auto insurance – https://autoinsurancequotesjax.org/general car insurance [url=https://autoinsurancequotesjax.org/]insurance car[/url] ’

  28. car insurance – https://affordablecarinsurancehnb.org/auto insurance quote [url=https://affordablecarinsurancehnb.org/]discount auto insurance[/url] ’

  29. insurance quote auto – https://bestcarinsurancejax.org/general car insurance [url=https://bestcarinsurancejax.org/]auto insurance rates[/url] ’

  30. quote auto insurance – https://carinsuranceratestnk.org/ auto insurance insurance [url=https://carinsuranceratestnk.org/]online auto insurance quote[/url] ’

  31. cheap car insurance quotes – https://autoinsurancequotetol.org/ car insurance quote [url=https://autoinsurancequotetol.org/]cheap car insurance[/url] ’

  32. top weight loss pills – http://healthyweightlossbn.net/ weight loss programs [url=http://healthyweightlossbn.net/]loss weight[/url] ’

  33. car insurance company – https://insurancecarbta.org/discount auto insurance [url=https://insurancecarbta.org/]car insurance companies[/url] ’

  34. payday advance – https://loansnocreditcheckrthh.org/ online personal loans [url=https://loansnocreditcheckrthh.org/]online loan[/url] ’

  35. installment loans – https://smallloanscashloansrtbh.org/fast loans [url=https://smallloanscashloansrtbh.org/]quick cash loans[/url] ’

  36. loan bad credit credit personal loans [url=https://installmentloanspersonalloandfgd.org/]fast cash loan[/url] ’

  37. online auto insurance quote cheapest auto insurance insurance quote auto [url=https://insurancecarbta.org/]car insurance quote[/url] ’

  38. payday cash loan – https://paydayloanonlinergezj.org/ direct lender payday loans [url=https://paydayloanonlinergezj.org/]payday loan lenders[/url] ’

  39. cash advance loans – https://onlineloanbadcreditloanegrv.org/cash advance loan [url=https://onlineloanbadcreditloanegrv.org/]installment loans bad credit[/url] ’

  40. cash advance loans – https://onlinepaydayloanswhbor.org/online payday loans no credit check [url=https://onlinepaydayloanswhbor.org/]cash advance american express[/url] ’

  41. personal loans bad credit cash loans online personal loans [url=https://badcreditloanserag.org/]cash loans[/url] ’

  42. for car insurance car on insurance teenage car insurance [url=https://carinsuranceghn.org/]car insurance what is[/url] ’

  43. get a auto insurance quote – https://autoinsurancequotesajy.org/homeowners insurance quote [url=https://autoinsurancequotesajy.org/]quotes car insurance[/url] ’

  44. top insurance companies cheap car insurance companies safe auto insurance company [url=https://carinsurancecompaniesrtbr.org/]top car insurance companies[/url] ’

  45. a car insurance quote – https://affordablecarinsurancenax.org/a car insurance quote [url=https://affordablecarinsurancenax.org/]cheapest car to insurance[/url] ’

  46. progressive auto insurance – https://insurancecarhum.org/ infinity insurance [url=https://insurancecarhum.org/]shelter insurance[/url] ’

  47. cheapest car insurance online – https://comparecarinsurancerfgj.org/car insurance estimator [url=https://comparecarinsurancerfgj.org/]low cost car insurance[/url] ’

  48. how much car insurance is – https://carinsurancecompanydfgh.org/insure new car [url=https://carinsurancecompanydfgh.org/]cheap insurance for car[/url] ’

  49. direct lender payday loans – https://paydayloansvar.org/america payday loans [url=https://paydayloansvar.org/]1000 payday loans[/url] ’

  50. cash advance loans – https://paydayloansonlinevlm.org/ cash advance inc [url=https://paydayloansonlinevlm.org/]cash advance loan[/url] ’

  51. debt consolidation loans bad credit – https://loansbadcreditthun.org/personal loans bad credit [url=https://loansbadcreditthun.org/]instant online loans bad credit[/url] ’

  52. payday loans no credit check online payday loans direct lenders cash advance american express [url=https://paydayloansonlinevlm.org/]online payday loans no credit check[/url] ’

  53. as girls wearing those hats that are made to look like animal heads: not at all.|A need to rebel against such a buttoned-up ethos leaves the white girl desperate for an identity

  54. It appears like one of the guys could handle one particular skinny girl twerking but when the other came it was too a lot for him.

  55. http://men-med10.spmuz1.ru/p-force/19632-dapoksetin-cena-v-apteke-jaroslavl.html Дапоксетин цена в аптеке ярославль

  56. I really love the way you discuss this kind of topic.;*.;-

  57. Thanks for all your valuable labor on this web site. My mum loves participating in investigation and it’s really obvious why. A number of us notice all of the powerful mode you convey invaluable guidelines by means of the web site and even increase participation from website visitors on that topic so our own princess is without question understanding a lot. Take advantage of the rest of the year. You have been doing a stunning job.

  58. I’m impressed, I have to admit. Actually rarely can i encounter a weblog that’s both educative and entertaining, and without a doubt, you might have hit the nail around the head. Your concept is outstanding; ab muscles a thing that too few individuals are speaking intelligently about. We are delighted i stumbled across this inside my seek out something with this.

  59. I’d ought to talk with you here. Which isn’t some thing It’s my job to do! I quite like reading a post that will get people to think. Also, thanks for permitting me to comment!

  60. You made some decent points there. I regarded on the internet for the problem and found most people will go along with together with your website.

  61. I haven’t checked in here for a while because I thought it was getting boring, but the last few posts are great quality so I guess I’ll add you back to my everyday bloglist. You deserve it my friend

  62. This is so good to see. We have do more things like this for the military families. They are protecting us and we need to support them in this way

  63. You completed certain fine points there. I did a search on the matter and found most persons will have the same opinion with your blog.

  64. I just want to say I am beginner to blogging and definitely enjoyed you’re web-site. Most likely I’m going to bookmark your site . You surely come with superb article content. Bless you for sharing with us your website.

  65. Wonderful goods from you, man. I have understand your stuff previous to and you’re just too magnificent. I actually like what you have acquired here, certainly like what you’re saying and the way in which you say it. You make it entertaining and you still care for to keep it sensible. I cant wait to read far more from you. This is really a terrific web site.

  66. Does your site have a contact page? I’m having trouble locating it but, I’d like to shoot you an e-mail. I’ve got some suggestions for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great website and I look forward to seeing it develop over time.

  67. You have observed very interesting points ! ps nice site. “If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one” by Abraham Lincoln.

  68. I was reading some of your content on this website and I conceive this site is really informative! Keep posting.

  69. Wow! Thank you! I permanently needed to write on my site something like that. Can I take a part of your post to my blog?

  70. I do trust all the concepts you’ve offered in your post. They’re really convincing and will definitely work. Nonetheless, the posts are very quick for beginners. Could you please prolong them a little from next time? Thanks for the post.

  71. Its superb as your other blog posts : D, thankyou for putting up. “The rewards for those who persevere far exceed the pain that must precede the victory.” by Ted W. Engstrom.

  72. I will immediately grasp your rss feed as I can’t to find your email subscription link or e-newsletter service. Do you have any? Please let me know in order that I may subscribe. Thanks.

  73. Merely wanna admit that this is invaluable , Thanks for taking your time to write this.

  74. What i do not understood is in reality how you’re not actually much more neatly-liked than you might be now. You’re so intelligent. You know thus considerably in terms of this subject, made me for my part consider it from so many various angles. Its like men and women don’t seem to be fascinated unless it is something to accomplish with Lady gaga! Your personal stuffs excellent. Always take care of it up!

  75. Hi my family member! I wish to say that this post is awesome, nice written and come with approximately all vital infos. I would like to see more posts like this.

  76. Very nice article and straight to the point. I don’t know if this is actually the best place to ask but do you guys have any thoughts on where to hire some professional writers? Thanks :)

  77. What i do not realize is in fact how you are not really a lot more smartly-liked than you may be now. You are very intelligent. You know therefore significantly on the subject of this subject, produced me individually consider it from a lot of various angles. Its like men and women aren’t involved except it is something to do with Woman gaga! Your own stuffs nice. All the time handle it up!

  78. I am continuously browsing online for posts that can facilitate me. Thx!

  79. I’ve been absent for a while, but now I remember why I used to love this website. Thank you, I¡¦ll try and check back more frequently. How frequently you update your site?

  80. Someone necessarily assist to make significantly articles I would state. This is the very first time I frequented your website page and thus far? I surprised with the research you made to make this particular put up amazing. Great process!

  81. You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this matter to be really something which I think I would never understand. It seems too complex and extremely broad for me. I’m looking forward for your next post, I’ll try to get the hang of it!

  82. MetroClick specializes in building completely interactive products like Photo Booth for rental or sale, Touch Screen Kiosks, Large Touch Screen Displays , Monitors, Digital Signages and experiences. With our own hardware production facility and in-house software development teams, we are able to achieve the highest level of customization and versatility for Photo Booths, Touch Screen Kiosks, Touch Screen Monitors and Digital Signage. Visit MetroClick at http://www.metroclick.com/ or , 121 Varick St, New York, NY 10013, +1 646-843-0888

  83. I got what you intend, thankyou for putting up.Woh I am happy to find this website through google. “Wisdom doesn’t necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up by itself.” by Woodrow Wilson.

  84. Wonderful site. Plenty of useful info here. I am sending it to several friends ans also sharing in delicious. And obviously, thanks to your effort!

  85. you’re in point of fact a excellent webmaster. The web site loading pace is incredible. It sort of feels that you are doing any unique trick. Moreover, The contents are masterpiece. you have performed a great activity on this matter!

  86. I¡¦ve read a few good stuff here. Certainly worth bookmarking for revisiting. I wonder how a lot attempt you put to make any such fantastic informative website.

  87. I have not checked in here for some time since I thought it was getting boring, but the last several posts are good quality so I guess I will add you back to my everyday bloglist. You deserve it my friend :)

  88. I have been exploring for a bit for any high-quality articles or weblog posts in this sort of space . Exploring in Yahoo I ultimately stumbled upon this web site. Reading this information So i am glad to convey that I’ve a very good uncanny feeling I came upon just what I needed. I such a lot definitely will make certain to don¡¦t fail to remember this site and provides it a glance on a constant basis.

  89. Merely wanna comment on few general things, The website design and style is perfect, the content is very great : D.

  90. Keep up the good work , I read few posts on this web site and I conceive that your website is really interesting and has got lots of excellent information.

  91. wonderful points altogether, you just won a brand new reader. What could you suggest about your post that you just made some days in the past? Any sure?

  92. Dead composed subject matter, thankyou for information .

  93. I am continually searching online for ideas that can aid me. Thx!

  94. I do agree with all of the ideas you have introduced to your post. They’re very convincing and will definitely work. Still, the posts are too brief for starters. May just you please extend them a little from next time? Thank you for the post.

  95. I am no longer sure the place you’re getting your info, but good topic. I must spend some time studying more or understanding more. Thank you for magnificent information I used to be in search of this info for my mission.

  96. Hi, Neat post. There is an issue with your website in web explorer, would test this¡K IE still is the market chief and a huge part of folks will miss your magnificent writing because of this problem.

  97. drug rehab treatment center drug rehab drug rehab centers drug addiction rehab drug rehab centers drug rehabs drug rehab centers drug treatment rehab drug rehab centers drug rehab drug addiction rehab centers

  98. Definitely believe that which you stated. Your favorite reason appeared to be on the web the easiest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I definitely get annoyed while people consider worries that they just do not know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top and also defined out the whole thing without having side effect , people can take a signal. Will likely be back to get more. Thanks

  99. I just couldn’t leave your site prior to suggesting that I extremely loved the standard information an individual provide to your guests? Is gonna be back often to investigate cross-check new posts

  100. Wow, awesome weblog layout! How lengthy have you ever been blogging for? you made blogging look easy. The entire look of your website is fantastic, as neatly as the content material!

  101. I will right away seize your rss as I can’t to find your email subscription hyperlink or newsletter service. Do you have any? Please allow me recognise in order that I may subscribe. Thanks.

  102. Hello, you used to write fantastic, but the last several posts have been kinda boring… I miss your great writings. Past several posts are just a little out of track! come on!

  103. Heya i’m for the first time here. I found this board and I find It really useful & it helped me out much. I hope to give something back and help others like you aided me.

  104. I see something truly special in this website.

  105. Well I truly liked reading it. This tip procured by you is very effective for accurate planning.

  106. Unquestionably believe that which you said. Your favorite reason appeared to be on the net the simplest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I definitely get irked while people consider worries that they just don’t know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top and defined out the whole thing without having side-effects , people can take a signal. Will likely be back to get more. Thanks

  107. This site is mostly a walk-via for all of the data you wanted about this and didn’t know who to ask. Glimpse here, and also youi’ll undoubtedly uncover it.

  108. Wow! This could be one particular of the most helpful blogs We’ve ever arrive across on this subject. Actually Wonderful. I am also an expert in this topic therefore I can understand your hard work.

  109. obviously like your website but you need to take a look at the spelling on several of your posts. Several of them are rife with spelling problems and I to find it very bothersome to inform the truth on the other hand I will definitely come again again.

  110. Nice blog here! Also your website loads up fast! What host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link to your host? I wish my website loaded up as fast as yours lol

  111. You can certainly see your skills in the paintings you write. The sector hopes for even more passionate writers such as you who are not afraid to say how they believe. Always follow your heart. “Until you walk a mile in another man’s moccasins you can’t imagine the smell.” by Robert Byrne.

  112. Helpful information. Lucky me I discovered your web site by chance, and I’m stunned why this coincidence didn’t took place earlier! I bookmarked it.

  113. It’s perfect time to make some plans for the future and it’s time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I could I desire to suggest you few interesting things or suggestions. Perhaps you could write next articles referring to this article. I desire to read more things about it!

  114. I was recommended this website by my cousin. I’m not sure whether this post is written by him as nobody else know such detailed about my problem. You are amazing! Thanks!

  115. naturally like your web site however you have to check the spelling on quite a few of your posts. A number of them are rife with spelling problems and I find it very troublesome to inform the reality nevertheless I will surely come back again.

  116. Great – I should certainly pronounce, impressed with your web site. I had no trouble navigating through all tabs and related info ended up being truly easy to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it in the least. Reasonably unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or something, web site theme . a tones way for your customer to communicate. Nice task.

  117. Somebody necessarily lend a hand to make seriously articles I would state. That is the first time I frequented your website page and so far? I amazed with the research you made to make this actual publish extraordinary. Great task!

  118. I have not checked in here for some time as I thought it was getting boring, but the last several posts are great quality so I guess I will add you back to my everyday bloglist. You deserve it my friend :)

  119. Great write-up, I am regular visitor of one¡¦s website, maintain up the excellent operate, and It’s going to be a regular visitor for a lengthy time.

  120. It is appropriate time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy. I have read this post and if I could I want to suggest you few interesting things or suggestions. Perhaps you could write next articles referring to this article. I desire to read more things about it!

  121. I like what you guys are up too. Such intelligent work and reporting! Keep up the excellent works guys I¡¦ve incorporated you guys to my blogroll. I think it will improve the value of my web site :)

  122. You really make it appear really easy with your presentation but I in finding this matter to be really something that I feel I would by no means understand. It seems too complicated and extremely large for me. I’m taking a look ahead on your next submit, I will try to get the cling of it!

  123. Hey, you used to write excellent, but the last few posts have been kinda boring… I miss your super writings. Past several posts are just a little out of track! come on!

  124. Great amazing things here. I am very satisfied to see your article. Thanks a lot and i’m looking ahead to contact you. Will you please drop me a e-mail?

  125. Thanks for another fantastic post. The place else may just anybody get that type of info in such a perfect means of writing? I have a presentation subsequent week, and I’m on the look for such info.

  126. Keep working ,splendid job!

  127. I cling on to listening to the news bulletin speak about receiving free online grant applications so I have been looking around for the best site to get one. Could you tell me please, where could i acquire some?

  128. Hi, Neat post. There’s an issue together with your site in internet explorer, could check this¡K IE still is the marketplace leader and a huge element of other people will omit your fantastic writing because of this problem.

  129. Hi, i think that i saw you visited my site so i came to “return the favor”.I’m trying to find things to enhance my website!I suppose its ok to use a few of your ideas!!

  130. I would like to show my gratitude for your kind-heartedness in support of those individuals that really need help with that area of interest. Your personal commitment to passing the message along came to be certainly advantageous and has continuously made people just like me to attain their goals. Your personal useful hints and tips indicates a lot to me and substantially more to my peers. Best wishes; from everyone of us.

  131. Its like you read my mind! You seem to know a lot about this, like you wrote the book in it or something. I think that you could do with some pics to drive the message home a little bit, but other than that, this is magnificent blog. A great read. I’ll certainly be back.

Speak Your Mind