The Scales of Douche: LeBron James Crowned by The King

July 12, 2010 By 6 Comments

I was on vacation last week and thus only waded briefly into the cesspool of opinion regarding LeBron James’ decision to take his talents to Connecticut for an ESPN special where he announced that he’d be taking his talents to South Beach.

In retrospect, I’m rather pleased I was removed from my daily blogging regimen during the week when sports – and certainly sports coverage – came dangerously close to jumping the shark.

Upon returning this morning, I was not planning on saying anything else about LeBron for awhile; but then I made a mistake, a big one: I stumbled upon a column by Jay Mariotti and, *gulp*, actually read it…at least the first two paragraphs anyway.

And after reading, I simply could not resist calling attention to one of the most ironic, laugh out loud hilarious examples I have ever seen of the pot calling the kettle black.

Jay Mariotti, yes Jay Mariotti, referred to LeBron James as a douche bag.

Here is the excerpt, in all its douchetastic glory:

LeBron had been hailed as an upstanding, gracious basketball ambassador who never found trouble and seemed much older than he was, right down to the deep wrinkles on his forehead.

Who ever thought that he would become a douche bag for the masses?

Pause with me for a second folks. Pause with me and re-read that sentence, considering both subject and author.

I can think of no greater manifestation for how far LeBron James’ reputation has fallen than being referred to as a douche bag by King Douche himself.

Sorry LeBron, but what I’m about to do, well, it simply has to be done.

So this morning – and this is *fight back smirk* very tough – but, this morning I am using my talents to award you 10 Mariottis on the Scales of Douche.

When one King crowns another, it is always cause for a celebration. And when Jay Mariotti refers to you as a douche bag, well, my hands are tied; the Scales of Douche are irrevocably tipped.

When I left for vacation last week, I never could have imagined a scenario that would cause me to write a post like this, but such is the Idiocracy of sports today.

LeBron James, The Chosen One, has now been anointed by Jay Mariotti, The Douchey One.

How does that make you feel LeBron?

lebron-james-doucheImage Source: BrandonBlattner.com

Words escape me.

Luckily, Vince Lombardi summed it up on a cold day a long time ago:

What the hell indeed.

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Filed Under: Scales of Douche Tagged With: douche bags, jay mariotti, lebron james
About Jerod Morris

A proud graduate of Indiana University, Jerod Morris founded Midwest Sports Fans in August of 2008 and has been its Managing Editor every day since. Follow him on Twitter (@JerodMorris) for MSF updates, sports discussion, and a compelling daily assortment of funny and interesting links.
In addition to his work at MSF, Jerod hosts the fast-growing Indiana basketball postgame show The Assembly Call and provides regular music recommendations at IndieChristmas.com. He also helped develop the Synthesis Managed WordPress Hosting platform on which MSF and all of his other sites are run.

  • Dorfineer

    You should have given him an additional 10 jumping Tiki's to go along with his 10 JM's…biggest douche EVER!

  • http://intensedebate.com/profiles/tiggymow tiggymow

    Its pretty clear this LeBron dude is WAY too full of himself.

    Lou http://www.privacy-tools.es.tc

  • http://intensedebate.com/profiles/tiggymow tiggymow

    Its become quite clear that this LeBron dude is WAY too full of Himself!
    http://www.privacy-tools.es.tc

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  • http://www.realtimemanager.net/industries.aspx Rick

    Most professional athletes border on levels of douche baggery.

  • Dago T

    Jay Mariotti, the face for radio.

    Enough said.