ESPN: The Worldwide Leader in…Baby Names?

Every time I think ESPN can’t possibly weasel it’s way into another place where it’s not wanted or supposed to be — other examples include: awards shows; primetime free agent “decisions”; and Monday Night Football — I find out that I’m wrong.

Today’s example:

That’s right, because a few attention-starved, possibly deranged families decided to curse their children for life by naming them after a cable sports network, has decided that this suggestion should be made to other parents who are so desperate that they need a website to help them choose a name.

The unfortunate screenshot is below.


Feel free to go search yourself if you don’t believe me.

When you scroll over a name, a small pop up window shows you what the name means, the origin, and whether it’s a boy or girl name. Let’s look at “ESPN” and the two adjacent names for comparison’s sake:

  • Esperanza: means “hope”; origin: Spanish; girl’s name
  • ESPN: means “Television Sports Network”; origin: American; boy or girl’s name!
  • Essence: means “aura, nature”; origin: American; girl’s name

First off, I thought “Obama” meant hope, although I guess Esperanza can share that meaning.

Secondly, “ESPN” is seriously considered a girl’s name? What girl wouldn’t start using prescription drugs and sleeping around in high school if their parents named her “ESPN”?

Thirdly, I love how brazenly honest is with the meaning of “ESPN”. They just come right out and tell you that if your name is “ESPN” then you are named after a television sports network. Not your dad, not your great grandpa who fought in World War II, not a famous person who did something great, no; you’re named after a television network that employs Skip Bayless and Colin Cowherd.

Woo. Hoo.

I guess ESPN can’t really be blamed for this. They aren’t managing the name database for, so we’ll just have to place the blame on whatever Bermanophile is in charge of adding new names. Parents naming their sons after a cable channel is self-indulgent parenting at its finest. Do we really need to encourage more of it?

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to get to the hospital. My son is due today and, if you don’t mind, I’d like to be there when little WGN Morris takes his first breath.

About Jerod Morris

I love words. I write for Copyblogger and founded MSF, The Assembly Call, & Primility. I practice yoga, eat well, & strive for balance. I love life. Namaste. Say hi on Twitter, Facebook, & G+.


  1. Can I just say what a reduction to seek out somebody who really knows what theyre talking about on the internet. You definitely know how one can deliver a difficulty to gentle and make it important. Extra individuals need to learn this and understand this side of the story. I cant consider youre not more common since you definitely have the gift.

  2. When I originally commented I appear to have clicked
    the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now whenever a comment is added I
    receive four emails with the same comment. Is there a
    way you can remove me from that service? Kudos!

  3. naturally like your web site however you need to take a look at the spelling on several of your posts. Several of them are rife with spelling problems and I find it very troublesome to inform the reality nevertheless I’ll surely come again again.

  4. It’s remarkable to pay a quick visit this website and reading the views of all friends concerning this
    piece of writing, while I am also keen of getting familiarity.

  5. Im obliged for the blog.Much thanks again. Great.

  6. I really like and appreciate your post.Thanks Again. Cool.

  7. Wow, great article post.Really thank you! Awesome.

  8. Im obliged for the blog. Great.

  9. Im obliged for the post.Really looking forward to read more. Really Great.

  10. A round of applause for your article post.Really thank you! Fantastic.

  11. I think this is a real great article post.Thanks Again. Awesome.

  12. Hi! This is my 1st comment here so I just wanted to give a quick shout out and tell you I really enjoy reading through your blog posts.

    Can you recommend any other blogs/websites/forums that
    go over the same subjects? Many thanks!

  13. Thank you for the sensible critique. Me and my neighbor were just preparing to do some research about this. We got a grab a book from our area library but I think I learned more clear from this post. I’m very glad to see such fantastic info being shared freely out there.

  14. FdNE3b JD Purity Most wanted Joomla design now available for Drupal

  15. This internet web site is actually a walk-through for all of the information you wanted about this and didn’t know who to ask. Glimpse here, and you will unquestionably discover it.

  16. I?ll right away clutch your rss as I can at to find your e-mail subscription link or newsletter service. Do you ave any? Please allow me know in order that I may subscribe. Thanks.

  17. This particular blog is really interesting as well as factual. I have chosen helluva helpful things out of this source. I ad love to return every once in a while. Thanks a lot!

  18. pretty handy material, overall I feel this is worth a bookmark, thanks

  19. In my opinion it is obvious. Try to look for the answer to your question in

  20. Wow, what a video it is! In fact pleasant quality video, the lesson given in this video is truly informative.

  21. Superb weblog here! Also your web site loads up quick! What host are you utilizing? Can I get your affiliate link to your host? I wish my internet site loaded up as rapidly as yours lol

  22. injure the child as nose during a tackle. Tracy says the animal still

  23. Thanks for the blog.Really looking forward to read more. Really Great.

  24. Websites we recommend Wow, superb blog layout! How long have you been blogging for? you make blogging look easy. The overall look of your site is excellent, as well as the content!

  25. You made some first rate points there. I appeared on the internet for the problem and found most individuals will associate with along with your website.

  26. Your method of explaining all in this piece of writing is truly good, all be able to simply be aware of it, Thanks a lot.

  27. This is certainly This is certainly a awesome write-up. Thanks for bothering to describe all of this out for us. It is a great help!

  28. I’а†ll immediately snatch your rss feed as I can not to find your email subscription link or newsletter service. Do you have any? Kindly permit me recognise so that I may subscribe. Thanks.

  29. I respect your work, regards for all the interesting blog posts.

  30. Thanks a lot for the post.Really looking forward to read more. Awesome.

  31. Super-Duper website! I am loving it!! Will be real backside soon to interpret a number of extra. I am captivating your feeds also

  32. Thanks for sharing, this is a fantastic blog post.Really thank you! Much obliged.

  33. I value the blog post.Much thanks again.

  34. Very good blog post.Really looking forward to read more. Awesome.

  35. I visited a lot of website but I conceive this one has got something extra in it in it

  36. I am so grateful for your post.Much thanks again. Awesome.

  37. loves can you say that about?) louis vuitton hlouis vuitton handbags replicabags replica it as back this fall in mouth watering chocolate. How can you go wrong

  38. Pretty section of content. I just stumbled upon your website and in accession capital to say that I get actually enjoyed account your blog posts. Anyway I’ll be subscribing for your feeds or even I success you get right of entry to consistently quickly.

  39. It is almost not possible to find knowledgeable folks within this subject, on the other hand you sound like you realize what you are speaking about! Thanks

  40. Thanks for sharing, this is a fantastic blog article.Really thank you! Much obliged.

  41. Thank you for your blog article. Really Great.

  42. Thanks-a-mundo for the article.Thanks Again. Want more.

  43. Rattling great info can be found on site.

  44. I really like and appreciate your article post.Really thank you! Great.

  45. we came across a cool web page that you may possibly appreciate. Take a look for those who want

  46. You made some first rate points there. I looked on the internet for the difficulty and located most individuals will go along with along with your website.

  47. Thanks-a-mundo for the blog article.Thanks Again. Fantastic.

  48. Thank you ever so for you blog.Thanks Again. Fantastic.

  49. WONDERFUL Post.thanks for share..extra wait.. ?

  50. Really enjoyed this article.Thanks Again. Really Cool.

  51. Awesome blog.Thanks Again. Fantastic.

  52. Very neat article post.Really thank you! Really Great.

  53. that will be the finish of this article. Here you

  54. This is a beautiful shot with very good lighting.

  55. Appreciate you sharing, great post.Really thank you! Great.

  56. Wow, marvelous blog layout! How long have you been blogging for? you made blogging look easy. The overall look of your site is fantastic, let alone the content!. Thanks For Your article about sex.

  57. I?ve learn a few good stuff here. Definitely price bookmarking for revisiting. I surprise how a lot attempt you set to create this type of fantastic informative web site.

Speak Your Mind