As many of you know, especially those of you who have been keeping tabs on the comment section of this week’s start em, sit em post, I have not been happy with Mike Sims-Walker since Sunday.
Last week, I touted him as a great play to everyone who would listen, started him in multiple leagues, and then watched him figuratively kick us all in the groin by being a late scratch Sunday and contributing nothing to any of our Week 5 causes.
So, needless to say, I’ve been pissed along with everyone else who started MS-W.
However, now that we know the reason for his Week 5 absence, the question must be asked: does guy code dictate that we no longer harbor ill will towards him?
If you have not heard, Mike Sims-Walker was getting it on with a friend of the female variety into the wee hours of Saturday night. His rendezvous caused him to miss bed check.
Sims-Walker missed bed check Friday night due to a visit with a female friend that went a little long, according to an NFL source, who described the situaton by saying, “undefeated and untied.”
So the question becomes: do we, as guys, need to let MS-W off the hook because his absence was merely an understandable sacrifice in the name of getting some? Or, are we allowed to maintain our anger because of MS-W’s flippant disregard for the old adage “bros before…those”. (You know what I mean here. For the record, not a huge fan of the original saying and trying to keep the site clean/nice these days.)
Will Carroll, via his Twitter account @injuryexpert, made a tremendous observation a few minutes ago when I posed this question on Twitter. Said Carroll: “I think we need pictures of said lady friend.”
This is an excellent point. As we all know, there are degrees of hotness for which guys will forgive eachother for the most egregious of offenses.
For example, consider the following two totally real occurrences:
Totally real occurrence #1:
Guy #1: Hey man, thanks a lot for showing up at my Mom’s funeral. Not. I can’t believe you’d skip it after she took you in when you were on the streets and then treated you like one of the family. I’m not sure I can ever forgive you.
Guy #2: Sorry man. I had a chance encounter with Halle Berry and then on the way to our hotel room we bumped into Shakira, who decided to join us. I really wanted to be there man, but you understand, right?
Guy #1: Oh. Yeah. For sure man, it’s all good. You get pictures?
Totally real occurrence #2:
Guy #1: Dude, what gives? I said meet me by the bar in 10 minutes so we could catch the end of this meaningless preseason game and eat some cashews.
Guy #2: Sorry man, got caught up with that chick over there.
Guy #1: Which one?
Guy #2: That one.
Guy #1: You mean the one that looks like Bill Romanowski with a wig?
Guy #2: Dude.
Guy #1: No, dude you. That’s no excuse. I’ve been waiting here for over three minutes you dickwad. Bartender, put his beer on his own tab.
So, as you can see, even the most unforgivable offense can be forgiven if the woman in question is of a certain level of hotness or unattainability. And on the flip side, if the lady even remotely resembles Bill Romanowski, well…honestly, you’ve probably got issues bigger than what your friend thinks.
Now back to the original question: what to do with all of our venom for Mike Sims-Walker.
I say that right now we don’t have enough information. Obviously we need to know more about the female, plus more about MS-W’s own situation. Is he married? Does have a girlfriend/kids? If so, that also changes the equation a bit.
In the end, I’m not friends with Mike Sims-Walker, so I can’t completely absolve him of blame for my awful Week 5 just because he was getting his jollies. All that was necessary was a little time management and/or savvy, and he could have had his cake and still played on Sunday too.
But the facts remain: he let down fantasy owners across the country, fans of the Jaguars, and his coaches and teammates.
If he was with Halle Berry and Shakira at the same time, fine. I think even God himself would forgive MS-W.
Anything less and Mike Sims-Walker remains in my doghouse, where he will stay until his next 7-catch, 100-yard, TD day. Then we’re cool again.
What say you MSFers?