7 Reasons to Hate the Indianapolis Colts
By: Nicholas Gerlach
I generally enjoy living in Indianapolis. The people are fairly nice. There are 3 or 4 attractive girls in the city and I know my way around by now. But, there is one thing I simply cannot enjoy….the Indianapolis Colts.
Here is a touchdown and extra points worth of reasons why:
1. Colts Fans: Easily the most fair-weather fans I have ever come across. I remember going to Colts games in
the early nineties in which half the stadium consisted of fans for the other team. Also, Colts fans are almost always complete pussies. Here is a story: Eric Metcalf had just broke out for his usual 50 yard plus TD run to open up the first drive of the game against Indy. Of course, I was celebrating my ass off. The Colts fans wife behind me said “sit down my husband is trying to enjoy the game and you’re taunting himâ€â€¦okay…that’s cool…you don’t like it…but why couldn’t the guy stand up for himself? I WAS 12 YEARS OLD!!!
Colts fans will often look at you in disbelief when you tell them there was a team in Indy before 1999. Well, Colts fans, there was…and they were absolutely atrocious. But you didn’t care until they started winning. It is pretty hard to find a Colts fan who knows who Jack Trudeau is (and not just because he serves alcohol to minors).
2. The Irsay Family: They gutlessly moved the team in middle of night in 1984, robbing one of the best football cities in 
the league of their favorite team. Johnny Unitas still referred to himself as a “Baltimore Colt†until the day he died and even put it in his will. At least when Art Modell moved the Browns he had the decency to let them keep their awesome name and sweet color scheme. This move set the precedent for dickhead owners to pull moves like this.
3. You are a Baltimore fan: As a Browns fan I hate you…sure. But, I also feel your pain because I too know the pain of being robbed of my favorite football team. At least the Cleveland franchise moved to a city who had heard of foot ball before. (Did you know that they had to move the first ever Colts game in the dome to 3 p.m. from 1 p.m. because they had to allow for people to get out of church in Indianapolis…and a lot of the fans showed up in suits and ties to the game?…WTF!!…Football is church!!!)
4. You are a Cleveland Browns fan: Indy takes the Colts, Baltimore takes the Browns….who’s really to blame here? (see number 2)
5. They play inside: Don’t kid yourself…Peyton Manning is going to complain and have the roof closed on Lucas Oil stadium every time there is a drop of rain or even a little bit of wind…what a crybaby pussy.
6. You are a New England Patriots fan: Is it really a rivalry?….really? The Colts have won 3 of the last 10 meetings between these two clubs. They have only beaten the Patriots once in the playoffs, and that took a miracle comeback. The Patriots have won every other playoff match up. That is, when the Colts could even get far enough in the playoffs to play the Patriots.
New England: 3 Super Bowl Championships; 4 AFC Championships
Indianapolis: 1 Super Bowl Championship; 1 AFC Championship
That’s not a rivalry…that’s an ass-beating.
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7. And finally, Female Colts Fans: Nothing says fall in Indianapolis like pink Manning jerseys and jean shorts…kill me. I think Russell knows what I’m talking about.
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So…can anyone think of any other reasons to hate the Colts?
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Tags: Cleveland Browns, Indianapolis Colts, Irsay, NFL, peyton manning
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“Female Colts Fans: Nothing says fall in Indianapolis like pink Manning jerseys and jean shorts….kill me.”
This is the greatest line that has been written on Midwest Sports Fans thus far, and quite possible the greatest line ever written anywhere in the history of mankind.
Thank you for not going any further with the mental image.
Reason #8: Mike Vanderjagt played for them.
Reason #9: The stupid phrase “Go Horse.” I want to impale myself with a horseshoe every time I hear or see that.
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Absolutely. That should have been a countdown to number one like Letterman….then again his number one’s always suck and that was perfect.
#10: Peyton Manning was a fag in college and Colts fans know it. Nobody in Indianapolis was rooting for Peyton to win any championships or Heismans, which he didn’t. Which correlates to everyone rooting for a loser like Mike Hart to make the team. He is solid and will though.
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Personally i hate the colts just for the fact that they beat the Chicago Bears in the Super Bowl. Also the fact that after the beat down i had to hear shit from my friend who was a colts fan that year. Well this kid was also a Steelers fan the year before, and he liked the Raiders before that. Nothing is worse then having to hear it from a kid who just picks the best team as his favorite team, give me a break.
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Aight well I wont disagree that the Colts are pretty lame, Tom Brady is by far the biggest tool in the league.
Wow, he looks like he is trying to molest you and solve a math problem at the same time
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^^^^ Dang you cant post pictures, so here is the link
http://llnw.image.cbslocal.com/28/2008/01/10/370×278/BradyMovadoAd.jpg
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Illinifan91: That seems to be a running trend with Colts fans. I can’t tell you how many Colts fans I’ve run across that were 49ers or Cowboys fans in the 90’s…it’s ridiculous.
TheNunn: While Tom Brady is a tool for going to Michigan. There is proof that he has bagged Bridget Moynahan and Giselle Bunchen.
Tom Brady > Peyton Manning
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All I have to say is that the picture of the guy with his dog made me laugh harder than anything else this week. That guy is a tool.
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Nick, great post. Colts Suck, Hoosiers Swallow. Jim Brown hold records for decades, Manning holds them for months…and then cries because he as a “touch of the downs”.
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Great article. Indiana has never been and never will be a football state. Aside from IU football’s atrocities they have enough trouble supporting their basketball-saviness, especially when the Pacers keep losing every year and Sampson spills his mess on the IU basketball program.
That picture of the dude with his dog…my first inclination was that Nico had totally become a tool and stolen rebel to pose as a turd.
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Indiana is really starting to lose their credibility as a basketball state. The Pacers had the lowest average attendance in the NBA last year. I know that they were hard to watch and had a rough patch for a couple of years…but I can’t believe that basketball fans in Indiana wouldn’t want to see basketball played at the pro level…even if it’s by the visiting team.
Plus, they should never have lower attendance than cities like Charlotte, Memphis and especially Atlanta…who has a notoriously apathetic fan base.
Really… if you think about… it Indiana is an auto racing state. The 500 is the biggest single-day sporting event in the world and they host the Brickyard and Drag Racing nationals which do very well.
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It’s sad but true. I’m really shocked at how Indy responded to the downturn by the Pacers, but I think the retirement of Reggie and the succession of run-ins with the law really didn’t sit well with the conservative fans base of Indy. Their fans will come back as they improve and increase the overall character of the team…but still. If Indiana truly is a “basketball state” the support would be more unconditional.
Where Indy and Indiana as a whole is great is supporting amateur sports…at least as much as college athletics can be defined as “amateur.” The college teams and high schools (especially in baseketball) enjoy a great deal of support.
As far as professional teams go, Indy only supports a winner. And that is the definition of fair-weather.
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Reason #11: They re-signed WR/TE Brian Fletcher after the season and then released him after the draft. I may only say this because I’ve met him and he is a great guy but he also came up big in the playoffs during their Super Bowl run and was the leading receiver during the regular season game @ San Diego in 2007 after Marvin and Dallas Clark went down. They even gave TE Utecht the heave-ho and still decided to go with the draft. Replaced with rookies with no ring and a little cheaper salary? The Colts don’t deserve a great guy like him.
Factoid! Did you know BFletch did Archie Griffin’s voice in this cartoon?
http://www.youtube.com/v/luXiwWFjLMQ&hl=en&fs=1
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I agree. The Colts deserve much hate for the release of Brian Fletcher. Any updates on if he is in any camps currently?
Screw putting a link in the comments though…create a post and embed the video.
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Bryan Fletcher, spelled like my brother’s first name but i just realized this looking to see if he has been involved in any NFL transactions. None at the moment but i will post a blog when it happens and have Davey give him a call for any sort of update. The Rams should sign him since McMichael is a tool at TE and they lost Issac Bruce, plus Bryan is from St. Louis.
I guess I can see a large commitment to the running game from the Rams this year. If you think Stephen Jackson isn’t worth a top 5 fantasy pick you are going to be disappointed. I think that was part of Jackson’s hold out reason because he knew that now more than ever Linehan will make the Rams a run first team as long as Pace is healthy all year.
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Scott Linehan makes Rich Kotite look like a competent head coach.
KVB…I kid, because I care.
Huge pet peeve: fantasy football writers who refer to Stephen Jackson as “SJax”. I don’t know why that makes me want to bang my head against a wall, but it does. It’s more efficient…just ridiculously annoying. Kinda like Josh Lewin, the former Cubs and current Rangers announcer.
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Okay, I understand that Indy has a few fair weather fans that water down the passion for sports here, and I understand that Peyton Manning is a little bland, but Indy is a great sports city! The Pacers are having a few rough years, but before that had a stretch where they went 16 of 18 years of making the playoffs. Who else does that? A few years before they went to the NBA they won 3 ABA Championships. The reason for the fan drop off is due to the behavior of the players off the floor. Indiana understands it’s basketball, and will not stand for guys who would rather get into a shootout at the strip club then work on their jumper. (I’m talking to you Tinsley!!!) A change had to be made and, although I can’t agree with the trading of Al Harrington and Steven Jackson for alter boys Dunleavy and Murphy, they are making steps in the right direction. It doesn’t help them win ball games, but the fans will come to the game and support guys who don’t get in trouble and are happy enough with having a great job playing basketball in an awesome basketball state.
I do have to admit that IU basketball is a little overhyped. We love it here, but their success has nothing to do with “tradition”, but owes everything to a certain Robert Montgomery Knight. God bless him. Should’ve never, never, let him go. Go Texas Tech!! If you really want to see what “Hoosier Hysteria” is all about, go to a high school basketball game. There’s nothing like walking into the gym during sectionals and feeling the energy in the air. You don’t get that in the NBA. And of late, there has been no lack of talent in the Indy area, as we have watched Greg Oden, Eric Gordon, Mike Conley, Dominick James, and many others play their high school careers here. And that’s just recently.
Now to Colts Football. I know, I know, they left Baltimore…dirty style. But what can I do about that? I’ve enjoyed watching the Colts build a franchise here. And we didn’t just now get good. I remember watching Jim Harbaugh and Marshall Faulk in the playoffs in the early to mid-90’s. Sure, no Super Bowls were won, but was anybody going to beat the Niners or Cowboys then?? Oh yeah, and there was a certain AFC Championship against the Steelers that the refs robbed us of a victory. So there was at least one time that we should’ve been in the Super Bowl. Not horrible considering the talent disparity between the two teams. We were an overachieving team then, and I think that most people in Indy hate the Colts now because they are sick of what they see as an underachieving team, which I can somewhat agree with. But I don’t see it as disappointment, just tough breaks. There are a lot of good teams in the league of late, and only one team can win it. We’ve consistently made the playoffs in the salary cap era, which is impressive in my mind. We have a great team that has been put together in an era where no one can resign anybody, and the Colts have built this great team through the draft, not the free agent market. Let’s look at the Colts 1st round draft history in order since 1994: Marshall Faulk, Ellis Johnson, Marvin Harrison, Tarik Glenn, Peyton Manning, Edgerrin James, Rob Morris (can’t get ‘em all right!), Reggie Wayne, Dwight Freeney, Dallas Clark, Bob Sanders, Marlin Jackson, Joseph Addai, and Anthony Gonzalez. Give me one team that has done better in the draft. Please, do it. It just proves that Bill Polian is the best GM in the business, and Tony Dungy develops defensive talent as well as any coach I’ve ever seen. Even late round picks Robert Mathis and Cato June are considered very good players. Thanks, Mr. Dungy!!
So I know there are some haters out there, but I will always stick behind my beloved Colts, Pacers, and Hoosiers, no matter what the circumstances.
P.S. Who’s this guy talkin bad about the Colts, a Browns fan?! Have they even made the playoffs in the last 25 years?? I forgot they even had a team!
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First off, you win the award (no prize, just recognition) for posting the longest and most well reasoned comment ever on Midwest Sports Fans. Congrats.
I agree with you on the Pacers. I think that Indy will always support a basketball team that is worthy of support; and character and integrity of the players plays into that. As they get it turned around and fans can be proud of the team win or lose, the support will come back. Obviously the hype and frenzy will be much stronger with a winner, but the support will be more consistent once the knuckleheads are gone.
As a lifelong Indiana Hoosiers basketball zealot, I probably cannot speak objectively about whether they are overhyped or not. I will say this though: IU basketball hype is not even close to being solely a function of Bob Knight. We had two national titles and had developed a strong tradition before the era of The General. Now, obviously, he built upon than tradition and took IU bball to the next level. But with our without him, Indiana is a basketball state and the Hoosiers are the only team in the state that has actually won championships. So they would be hyped and have a big following even without the 29 exciting years of Bob Knight.
And the Colts? This is where the city of Indianapolis will be tested in regards to their support. This is an aging team that is starting to fall off. Bill Polian will need to executive a major facelift to keep them competitive into the next decade. I have my doubts about how supportive Indy fans will be if the team becomes a 6-10 to 8-8 team. No doubt they will support a team that cruises to 12 wins every year and has one of the five biggest superstars in the NFL at QB. What about after the Peyton Manning era? Remember the time before the Manning era? The support wasn’t nearly what it is now. If Indy fans continue to support the team when they inevitably struggle again, I will give them some credit. Until then, I’m skeptical.
Thanks for the comment Mr. WhoHitYa. Conversation and interaction is what makes keeping this blog entertaining.
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[...] the Indianapolis Colts plan on competing for another Super Bowl title, they will have to figure out a way to stay healthy, [...]
Well, the Colts are now 3-4 on the year and it looks like the best they can hope for is a wild card berth. They are down four games to the Titans with 9 games left.
I guess that this will cause a surge in Pacers season ticket sales and Meridian street will be riddles with the bodies of people that are falling off the Colts bandwagon.
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most colts fans were bears fans until the colts started to win with peyton manning…their fans suck big time. went to one game and all these old white people (i’m white) kept telling me to sit down. too bad it was the bears putting a beat down on them in the brand new opening of their crappy new stadium. grow a pair and go back to being a bears fans. no one tells you to sit down at those games…they yell at you for sitting down. weak ass fans. only team i know that has >80
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[...] is one reason, other than their silly fans, that I stay away from owning Indianapolis Colts players in fantasy football. Trying to assess [...]
Ok dudes i hate u f**kn haters. Colts colts rule and this dude tht is hating on the colts could go back to his mommas house
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Andy Reply:
October 14th, 2009 at 9:41 pm
lol
Dan Begley is a Colts fan! Excuse me, a "Colts colts" fan.
Point at Dan in his pink jersey and laugh, children.
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That is the greatest article ever written! Not only did the 3-4 cute Indy girls cut like a knife but every point was valid. I always hated the colts growing up and I still remember most of their old players and the “true fans” couldn’t even name past decent players. Any decent player back in the day left ASAP in Free Agency. Getting to the point what I can add is the countless fuckin hoosiers naming their kids Peyton. This is NOT a football town.
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